Self esteem is arguably the most important thing that you can possess in this life.
Some people would say money but I say fuck money. Self esteem trumps money because if you have self esteem then the money will follow. You’ll get the job interview and you’ll nail it. Or you’ll get the girl, the one who’s dad is loaded and who allows you to borrow his golf cart to do your errands and who then lends you his butler to do your errands so you can just piss about on the golf cart until finally you get bored/kicked of the golf course. Or you’ll have the confidence to play the old Long Game Hustle on the rube with the dough. Either way the money will follow.
Without self esteem things can start to look bleak and a bad day can turn into a shitty week which can lead to an abysmal month, followed closely by an horrific year.
This week I’ve read a lot of blogs who are taking this 2014 thing very seriously. We’re only a couple of days in and they’re already beating themselves up about the future. Will I make a resolution or won’t I? Will I have the will power to keep it? Will the will be willing? Will this year be better than the crap I had to endure last year? Will I get fit? Will i fit into the jeans i bought when i was 11 years old. Will i fit in to social situations? Fall in love? Go on holiday? Crack a rib? Make a friend? Have an aneurysm? Etc etc. When really you should be asking yourself: Will I ever shut the fuck up and grow a pair?
Do you think Ryan Gosling is walking around wondering if he’ll make a resolution and keep it? Do you think he’s crying into his pillow about how his hand wouldn’t stop stuffing turkey into his gob this Christmas and asking himself what he’s supposed to do now that he’s just woken up from a chocolate biscuit coma?
Fuck No! Ryan Gosling is walking around thinking how great it is to be Ryan Gosling, if only he could get those pesky screaming women out of his face and out of his bed.
I guess people want shit to just fall out of the sky and onto their laps. I guess they don’t realize that if you want something you’ve got to work for it or at the very least towards it. Not just sit there in their crummy cells thinking ‘Life’s not fair. Nothing good ever happens to me’.
Do you think Ryan Gosling thinks like that? Do you? Do you think The Gossler just woke up one morning and said “You know what, I’d love to be famous. Oh what is this on my phone? A message from a big Hollywood Director? i wonder what he wants…”
No! It probably took him ages going to acting classes, getting rejected, auditions, getting rejected, therapists, getting rejected etc.
(pictures from excellent option.com and myfilmviews.com)
Spoiler Alert: If you just sit there complaining or worrying nothing good is going to happen to you. Ever.
So to those of you who are feeling a bit down this season allow me to offer you a friendly kick up the arse in the form of an uplifting (or frightening, depending on how you choose to look at it) statistic. Here it is:
Every day at least three people in the world are bundled into the back of a mini van by someone who wants to kill them.*
So you see, things could be worse. you know, as long as that’s not you in the trunk then you’re one step ahead.
So get off your moaney ass and stay one step ahead.
Like Ryan Gosling in that movie he did where he was always one step ahead until he went berserk and killed everybody.
I think it was called “The Notebook”.
Ok seriously that’s enough about Ryan Gosling.
Ry to the Ling.
Or Ryano von Goslington as he’s known to his close friends…and me.
*Statistics were gathered and calculated from many different sources including but not limited to:
-The fact that I saw three people get into a minivan today(possibly on the way to soccer practice. Possibly not.)
-A place I like to call ‘Off the Top of my Head’.
Plus it’s probably more like three a week. Three a day seems excessive. Unless you live somewhere like Columbia…or Tallaght.
And I’ll also admit that limiting the bundling to Minivans is probably not very realistic. I believe Volvo’s are quite spacious and won’t break down on you on the way to your dump-site..